The Pull Doesn’t Always Mean Go

This month has been the hardest month for writing and recording. 

It’s not that I don’t want to write or record… 

It’s just that I am feeling really pulled to a lot of things. 

By the time I put all this energy here it feels like I don’t have the time or energy left for all the other things that I feel pulled to. 

That’s been tough. 

But it’s also been a pattern. 

And in the spirit of trying to do things differently and being aware in a way that I once wasn’t – 

I see it. 

I hear it. 

I understand it. 

If I would have listened to every pull, I wouldn’t still be here, on day 96 – still writing and recording. 

I hear the whispers within asking me if this is the right decision. 

What if I am missing out on something even better because of my refusal to shift gears? 

But, I always used to shift gears. 

I always used to listen. 

And what I can see behind me is a lot of half-started projects. 

What I don’t know is what happens if I don’t listen. 

If I stay in it. 

If I keep going. 

So I push through what is hard, and I trust that nothing that is meant for me will miss me. 

I let the pull to the other projects keep compiling. 

The Pattern Mapping Foundation Series and Journal have shown me that if a project wants out badly enough-

It will. 

Maybe the whole point isn’t to rush the moment there is a pull. 

Maybe the whole point is to commit to things that make me feel more like myself and honor them, no matter what. 

Maybe it’s trusting even more deeply that everything else will happen when it’s meant to. 

Maybe instead of fearing the pulls, the decisions- I should be celebrating them.

Because maybe the pull doesn’t always mean go. 

Maybe sometimes it simply means notice. 

There’s something here. 

There’s something I want. 

There’s something waiting for me when the time is right. 

I don’t have to abandon what I’m doing to honor it. 

I don’t have to chase it before it disappears. 

I can say thank you. 

I can hold onto it. 

And sometimes, the most important thing I can do in the moment is simply remain steady.  

Reflection Questions

• When I feel pulled toward something new, what do I usually believe that pull is asking me to do? 
• What might change if I allowed myself to notice the pull without immediately acting on it? 
• What am I committed to right now that deserves the chance to see what happens if I remain steady? 

Watch the Convo that inspired the reflection here: