Am I Giving Up Too Soon? 

I think that chances are necessary. 

Allowing people to mess up and then giving them a real chance to learn and change is one of the only real ways people learn to change. 

I’ve seen it over and over again. 

But just because you give someone chances, it doesn’t guarantee that the behavior will change. 

It could keep happening. 

This is where, I find, it’s the hardest. 

How do you know if you should keep giving chances or walk away? 

How do you know if this is the time it really matters? 

Am I giving up too soon? 

Or am I hanging on too long?

This is something that I have struggled with forever, but I am starting to think that maybe – just maybe –  it was never meant to feel like this much of a struggle. 

When I quiet my mind, do I know? 

Do I know if I want to keep going? 

Do I know if I want it to end? 

Do I listen? 

I’ve had moments where I hung on too long when I knew full well that I shouldn’t. 

I’ve had moments when I didn’t listen to myself, only to find myself feeling that way again later. 

I found myself wishing that I would have listened sooner. 

But I also found myself thinking about all the things that had changed because I didn’t listen. 

All the great moments. 

All the things I learned. 

All the things I feel grateful for. 

Because that’s the thing. 

No matter if I stayed or walked away, I still learned. 

I still had good and bad. 

I was still walking a path forward. 

Maybe this will always be a mystery. 

Maybe there is no right or wrong. 

I have definitely had plenty of moments that I wished I would have held on longer too… moments where I could see that I let the hurt feelings lead the way. 

I found myself wondering what could have been… and ultimately reminding myself that if it was meant to be, it would be. 

Maybe that’s the point. 

Maybe I’m not asking the right question in these moments. 

Maybe it isn’t:

 Should I keep going?

 Or should I throw in the towel? 

Maybe there isn’t a question that will guarantee I make the right choice. 

Because maybe there isn’t one.

Maybe there is only the choice I make – and what I choose to do with it afterward. 

I can stay and learn. 

I can leave and learn. 

I can make the choice I eventually wish I hadn’t made and still find something beautiful because of it. 

Maybe I don’t need to know how the whole thing ends before I decide what feels true for me right now. 

Maybe I just need to get quiet enough to hear myself. 

Not the fear. 

Not the guilt. 

Not the hope that someone else will change. 

Not the fear that I’ll regret it. 

Me. 

And maybe whatever I hear doesn’t have to be forever. 

Maybe it just has to be true today. 

Reflection Questions

• When you quiet the fear, guilt, hope, and expectations – what do you already know? 
• Are you staying because you genuinely want to be here – or because you’re afraid of what leaving might mean? 
• What would feel true for you today, if you didn’t have to decide forever?

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