DAY 2 

MANTRA: “My most authentic self will lead me to success.”

I woke up and checked the time. I had 45 minutes before my 5 AM alarm went off. 

Forty- Five minutes. 

Before I started this challenge, that would have meant I was definitely going to pretend to fall back asleep. 

Really I would have rolled around, drifted in and out and woke up wanting to stay in bed even more than I did at 4:15AM. 

I shut down my thoughts. 

My feet hit the floor. 

I was getting up and at it. 

If I am up, I am supposed to be. 

Trust it. 

Today might have been harder to get out of bed but I still got out of bed. 

 I could hear the excuses wanting to flood my brain and I shut them down.  

I listened to this new version of myself instead. 

I knew why I wanted to stay in bed. It was obvious. 

It was warm and comfy and everyone in it was warm and comfy. 

Staying in bed won’t get me the results I am looking for though. 

From this moment on, I have to choose. 

Results, or comfort?

When I am being truly honest with myself, I find comfort throughout my day. I have plenty of it. 

I didn’t start this challenge to find more comfort. 

I started this challenge to create more results. 

I was ready to get uncomfortable. 

Rerouting my brain and my habits is something that I have been building on for years. It didn’t happen overnight because I didn’t create these patterns overnight. 

The shifts started happening throughout the process of laying the foundation.

The more times I tried, failed, learned, and tried again- the more that shifted. 

The more aware I became, the more I was able to move with my life instead of fighting with my life. 

Getting uncomfortable was setting me free. 

Yesterday sealed in a lot for me. 

I feel so much better when I am knocking out things that I want to do. When I start my day strong by prioritizing my wellbeing it comes naturally throughout my day. 

I move more. 

My mood is higher. 

I feel clear. 

I am more creative. 

I am more peaceful.

I consistently stay in a better place- mind, body and soul- all day long. 

It also frees me up for whatever comes my way later. 

It doesn’t leave me scrambling and rushing just to check off a box or saying no to things that I really want to say yes to because I “have to” do something else. 

When I take care of myself first, I feel blessed that I GET TO. Nothing feels like I have to. It also leaves me feeling like I have so much more time in my day. 

That’s the thing about time. It isn’t really about the amount of time that matters. It’s about the quality. 

That’s why 1 minute can feel like a lifetime if you are doing something hard, and it can feel like a second when you are doing something you love. 

When it comes to the rest of my time here, that’s what it’s about. Quality over quantity. 

That got me thinking. 

Why wouldn’t I choose this quality time for myself every day? 

Why would I ever choose anything that isn’t this? 

The fact of the matter is… when I don’t choose wellness, it’s because I don’t want to feel good. 

I never saw it like that before I started this challenge and before I would have argued with anyone that said this to me. There was no way I was CHOOSING to not feel good. 

I wasn’t aware that was how I was moving but looking back at my before vs now, it’s true. 

Damn, day two and I am already breaking my world wide open!

When I don’t choose the things that make me feel great, it’s because my background is running something without my knowledge that needs my attention. 

Something bubbles up from within that I didn’t previously have conscious awareness around. 

Doubt, fear, grief- whatever it is, it needs love. It needs me to see it, hear it, feel it, and understand where it’s coming from. 

And then it needs me to let it go by loving myself through it. 

I have handled this part of healing in ways that didn’t previously support what I want in my present, and it definitely didn’t support the future that I am dreaming of. 

The old wounds that I have neglected and pushed aside over and over made their way to the surface and I would shut down, pull away, curl up, and let it take me over. 

I quit. 

I let them win when they were never trying to beat me. 

They were trying to get me to heal them. 

Instead of giving myself what I needed, I saw it as an attack and I let it affect every single thing around me. 

It created the feeling that every bad thing that happened to me in my past- was happening to me right now. 

It kept me locked in what was, not what is. 

I know what I need. 

I need to move my body, write it out, meditate, drink my water and let it go. 

I need to find gratitude and be intentional with my breath. 

If I am still ungrounded after that, I need nature.

Sometimes I need to talk it out in a safe space. 

I need to use my words. 

I need to find my peace. 

I have a whole tool chest of things that can help me, yet my old patterns wouldn’t allow me to even acknowledge that I had everything that I need. It told me the opposite. 

Staying centered, staying present, staying grateful and letting it pass leads me to the path I have always been looking for. 

That’s it. 

I don’t need all the dramatics. 

I don’t need all the dilly-dallying around what I am feeling.  

I just need to jump in and greet myself with curiosity and consistency. 

I know that there are going to be days that I don’t want to get up. Days that I am sore. 

Days that I don’t feel great. 

Days that are a lot harder than others. 

That is okay. 

The important part of this is just to keep going. 

To not give up. 

75 days of consistency to see where it leads. 

I have proved to myself time and time again that if I want it bad enough, I can do it. 

I have also proved time and time again that it is worth it. 

I want it bad enough. 

I know that I am capable. 

I must own the great things about myself the way that I used to only own the hard things. 

This time it’s about me vs me, and this is just the beginning.